Eventually, we kissed goodnight and went to bed in our own rooms. We didn’t want the night to end, but knew that it had to. We just stood there and held each other for a long time, not really sure what to do next. When it came time to say goodnight, we embraced in the hallway, outside her hotel room, and just didn’t let go. We ended up alone later that night, and were filled with mixed emotions - her departure was a good career move, but clearly we were going to miss each other. She was leaving the company, and on her last day we had a chance to have dinner with colleagues to wish her well. We never proceeded to take anything further personally when we worked together, that was clearly not something that either of us thought was appropriate and although we grew closer over that time, nothing ever happened and we never talked about mutual affection. We were both the person in our marriages who seemed to be overcompensating for the spouse who had issues, and it was exhausting. Similar stresses, similar issues with our spouses who in one way or another are dysfunctional, similar desire to do the right thing and make sure we are doing right by our kids. We each have two kids of similar ages, and our perspectives on our marriages were very well aligned. She was going through a rough patch with her husband, and my marriage felt like it was spiraling downward. We worked together closely for a year or two, and during that time got to know each other pretty well. I’m currently in situation where I have an ongoing relationship with a friend who I only see a few times a year, as she lives in Europe and I’m in the US.

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